Who Is This Man?

It is Keith Urban - Nicole's new husband. The more that I dig up on this guy the more I feel I'm on a repulsed-excited-scared-sick-queezy-giddy-stupid-dribble-uncontrollably-and-then-come-to-my-senses-you-silly-fool emotional rollercoaster. A shape changer extraordinaire.

George Is Just Raking In The Leaves

Boy George has been ordered to rake leaves. Judge Anthony Ferrara said that George O'Dowd, former lead singer of the eighties band CULTURE CLUB, convicted in March of wasting police time, must complete five days of work by Aug 28. "This is a simple matter of five days of community service. It's up to you as to whether it will be an exercise in humiliation or an exercise in humility," the judge scolded.

O'Dowd had also been fined for falsely reporting a burglary to escape a more serious charge of drug possession when police found cocaine at his New York home. He claimed that the drugs had been left by party guests.

Pointing to the door out of the court, Judge Ferrara said: "I'm going to make you a promise: if you do the community service, you go through that door."
Then, gesturing to the door through which prisoners are taken, he added: "But if you don't do it, you go through that door. You must bring your toothbrush." The proverbial line in the sand was drawn.

Even though O'Dowd would have preferred to do some Aids charity work he denied suggesting that he would not do community service. Asked if he would mind raking leaves, he replied: "I've always been a scrubber."

The many faces of George - here with Rosie O'Donnell

Culture Club

Its Wedding Bells For The Urbmans

I knew Nicole would scrub up well for this one.

Rupert Murdoch and his wife Wendy Deng

Art Is Found Under A Woman's Skirt

Japanese artist Noriko Sunayama is wrapped in a crimson dress during her exhibition: "A SULTRY WORLD" at the Yokohama Museum of Art, Japan. The audience is invited to venture under her dress and communicate with what is found beneath.

The Kids Are Here!

Connor Kidman Cruise and Isabella Kidman Cruise arrive for the wedding of the year. Flying around the world for these kids must be a weekly event. I still have my reservations about the Kidman/Urban nuptials. Nicole seems to be the ice maiden-ivory tower-untouchable-verging on vixen type. Keith seems to be a smiley-teeth whitening fanatic-country bumpkin who no one seems to know anything about. Nicole has gone back to Catholicism and left her Scientology roots behind (I actually didn't know that Nicole had converted to Scientology but I've been recently informed otherwise). I wonder if Connor and Isabella have to do the Scientology hop?

Nicole's Mum Janelle accompanies Isabella and Connor from the airport.

St Patrick's College in Manly (Sydney Australia), where Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban are rumored to be getting married. A white marquee is erected at the back.

St. Andrews Honors Michael Douglas

Michael Douglas walks into the quadrangle after receiving his honorary degree from St Andrews University in Andrews, Scotland. Many people wonder what all these honorary degrees are about and they have every right to keep wondering because nobody really knows - Principal and Vice-Chancellor Dr Brian Lang tries to fathom the decision; "We are honouring Michael Douglas in recognition of his outstanding contribution to British film."

Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta-Jones are both golf fans and are regularly spotted on and off the University's famous golf course when they visit Britain; "I had never seen so many beautiful women in my life", Douglas begins to salivate. Anyway its a relief to see that Michael can keep his sex addiction to one side for this auspicious occasion.

Rocky's Revelling In Another Round

President and CEO of the Brenden Theater Corporation Johnny Brenden, Sylvester Stallone, model Diana Funes and Creative Advisory Board Chair Dennis Hopper, arrive at the CineVegas film festival screening of ROCKY BALBOA at the Brenden Theatres inside the Palms Casino Resort in Las Vegas, Nevada. Stallone is at it again with the sixth ROCKY. See, I thought the first one had some street cred and all that but this is ridiculous. Memories of nerdy love and fighting hanging sides of beef are long gone. I have to say though, I sort of have the hots for Stallone - he scrubbs up well still - you big ol' nickumpoop!

Jodie Foster once said that she thought Dennis Hopper was one of the most attractive men she had ever met. I think he's enigmatic but I'm still scared of him because of his portrayal of Frank Booth in BLUE VELVET dir. David Lynch, 1986.

Liza Cannot Leave CABARET Behind

Liza Minnelli attended the 14th annual American Society of Young Musicians' House of Blues Spring Benefit Concert and Awards Show at the House of Blues in Los Angeles, California. Of course her presence was the only one that stood out there. It seems that Liza cannot leave the image she created with her late father, Vincente Minnelli alone. The father and daughter team were responsible for her complete look for her Oscar winning performance in CABARET dir. Bob Fosse, 1972. Many giggles, crazed babblings and spaced out stares later, she is still carrying the CABARET torch. Good on her I say - I hope there are many high kicks to come.

Now marrying David Gest was an act of sheer genius on Liza's part to move the attention on to his weird head. Now that they have sadly parted ways, Liza must hold the fort.

Heather Mills To Sue Over 'False' Prostitute Claims

HEATHER Mills is to sue over allegations that she used to be an 'high class' prostitute who engaged in group and lesbian sex, her lawyers said yesterday. Mills' lawyers said claims in the News of the World that she was paid thousands of dollars for wild sex romps with wealthy Arabs when she was in her 20's were "untrue and highly defamatory". Mills will be launching legal proceedings but not until her divorce from Paul McCartney was finalized (because she wants to see how well she does out of that first). "Heather is very distressed by this article. She continues to recover slowly from her revision amputation operation and has suffered weight loss, anxiety and sleeping problems as a result of the stress and anxiety of the break-up of her marriage. The coverage of this in certain newspapers has caused further distress and illness to her, her concerned lawyers pleaded. "The interests of her daughter are of paramount concern. She will defer issue of legal proceedings until the arrangements in relation to the divorce are concluded but intends to sue at that stage all parties (including individuals) who are intent on damaging her reputation."

Last week, a tabloid newspaper showed Mills posing in a series of topless shots from a 1988 German publication, which she described as a "lovers' guide". Mills seems to be tripping herself up at every turn.

One more thing, that dye she made Paul McCartney use to cover his grays looks ghastly (pictured right).

Susan Sontag Lives In Pictures At The Metropolitan

Susan Sontag died of leukemia Dec. 27, 2004 at the age of 71. As a novelist, an essayist and critic, Sontag was a major force in the intellectual life of New York. Being renowned for her passionate writing on photograghy, The Metropolitan Museum Of Modern Art is presenting an exhibition of 40 photographs that celebrate Sontag's contribution to the history of the medium from the 6th of June through to the 3rd of September.

"The ultimate wisdom of the photographic image is to say: 'There is the surface. Now think - or rather feel, intuit - what is beyond it, what the reality must be like if it looks this way.' Photographs, which cannot themselves explain anything, are inexhaustible invitations to deduction, speculation, and fantasy. Photography implies that we know about the world if we accept it as the camera records it. But this is the opposite of understanding, which starts from not accepting the world as it looks." - Susan Sontag, from ON PHOTOGRAPHY.

Mount Merapi Blows Back To Life

In Yogyakarta Indonesia, Mount Merapi (fire mountain) is now spewing ash after the devastating May 27 Earthquake that killed 5,700 people. Its volcanic activity is increasing.

Uri Geller Makes Believe

Uri Geller is bending more spoons at 'Believe-athon', an event held to inspire British soccer fans to believe they can actually win the world cup. Geller was commissioned by Mars to be some sort of spiritual counselor for the British public. Seeing they all munch on mars bars all the time, Mars has renamed they bar 'Mars - Believe' so that subliminally all the happy munchers will sleep, eat and dream positive thoughts about their teams chances. Uri thought that bending some spoons would help also.

Uri actually missed out on that Elvis mansion he bid on through E-Bay. Psychically, Uri knew-thought-hoped-conjured the winning bid. He and his team of bidders thought they had the winning bid but it fell through to another buyer. 'Of course we will sue', a dismayed Uri muttered. Uri was certain of his claim for the Elvis Mansion as he had heard Elvis being played on the radio; 'We shall turn it into a house for the sick children of the world'.

Dada In New York

Dada is one of the twentieth century's most influential avant-garde art movements. Dada began in Switzerland during WWI and peaked from 1916 to 1920. Dada was characterized by the absurd - unrelated imagery fused together to become whole, an irrationality born out of sheer disgust for the war and what it was doing to the world. Beyond the emotional it went further and dabbled in chance and randomness rejecting acceptable mainstream art practices which made the movement a forerunner in conceptual art. Andre Breton led the revolutionists and was also the instigator of The Surrealist movement. The exhibition runs from June 18 to September 11, 2006 at MoMA.

The MOJO Honors List 2006

The MOJO HONORS AWARDS are held in London to recognize career long contributions to popular music. I have no idea why Jon Bon Jovi and Elton John are posing together (except Elton has been acting a bit demented lately screaming abuse at reporters while dressed in lycra jumpsuits)

Nick Cave looks like a stunned mullet here posing with Rosanne Cash who picked up an award for the late Johnny

Mick Jones from THE CLASH poses here with a surprisingly freshed faced Chrissie Hynde who received THE MOJO SONGWRITERS AWARD

Mani and Bobbie Gillespie from PRIMAL SCREAM pose with Jim Reid of THE JESUS AND MARY CHAIN (all looking like bored-fab-strung-out-popstars)

Olivia Newton-John's Boyfriend Fakes Death?

According to an investigation held by THE DAILY TELEGRAPH, Patrick McDermott (the missing creepy boyfriend of Olivia Newton-John) has been spotted alive and kicking in the remote Baja Peninsula, Mexico.

As I reported months ago (Olivia Newton-John Reaches For Lost Love), Olivia was pining for her lover of nine years as he had gone missing from a fishing vessel named 'Freedom' on July 1st, 2005. Now it is believed McDermott faked his death in order to escape mounting debt and possibly a jail term for not paying thousands of dollars in child support.

The fishing boat made a stop outside San Pedro in Los Angeles that would have made it possible for McDermott to abscond out of Olivia's heart for ever and reach dry land. 'Freedom' for McDermott was more than a boat.

The fishy Mr. McDermott